Tell someone one hundred great things that they do. Put you mind to sharing the positives that they may not know you know.
One hundred seems a lot, but you will find it isn’t that much when you put your mind to it. The point is to make you deeply consider what someone does that is special, amazing, unique, admirable or just appreciated. One hundred also pushes you to go well past what they expect you can do.
The first quarter will be easy. The middle half forces you to deepen your thinking and consider the other person’s contributions more widely. The last quarter will flow and it’s unlikely you will be unable to stop at #100.
The final list will end up including:
- widely acknowledged great talents,
- talents they thought were hidden,
- things they don’t appreciate, and
- mutual surprises.
This is a process of appreciation, but also one of mutual discovery and learning. Use this process to deepen a relationship or refresh the value of a friendship. Use the process to make another feel seen or to help them in a darker moment. We can be uncomfortable to own our strengths. Hearing them from others in such volume provides recognition, a boost of confidence and a great fillip to the mood. This helps restore the context that only others can provide.
As impressive as delivering all this praise at once maybe you can also spread it out. One item of praise at a time or five, ten, or twenty at a time will stretch out the sharing and reflection. Make it an experience, an ongoing confidence boost or the basis of a conversation. You could even make a physical record, ritual, or gift part of the giving of praise.
Number every single moment of praise. It allows you both to track progress, to feel the weight of the appreciation and to build anticipation. Numbers will help you prevent duplication and also to appreciate that this is a particular list for an unique person. The numbers too can be a new shared language to reinforce the praise.
We can change the lives of others with small big things. Recognition, care, praise and support are small big things. They make a huge difference to others.